Likes to do drawings.

So how is this going to work? From what I understand, the blog is dedicated to the illicit sexiness of peering into conversations, while perhaps sinking the ships of all these loose lips. My own, and others. Hopefully no one gets too incriminated. I do enough of that shit in real life. Haven't actually decided how to post this next series of emails. I know they would be more intruiging as actual serials; letting the conversation that has already taken place peel out over time. But I have never been good at the reveal, and when someone is trying to seduce me, I generally just giggle and take all my clothes off. So here is the beginning of tied-up and knotted semi-anonymous conversation. This one spilled out all at once, because I am trying to rope you in and also I couldn't wait. The two worst reasons to do anything.

Well, the following conversation and indicated interaction took place after one woman's casual encounters ad was posted on Craigslist. It begins with the man's response:

Fri. June 3, 2005

HIM

I'm 26 yrs. old 6'5", 225 lbs.  I'm very

proportional..  I used to be a cheerleader at the

University of ________.  I'd love to cheer you on tonight!

HER

really?

why?

HIM

Because first, I'll slowly take off your pants.  Then

I'll rub your panties and make them very wet.  Then,

I'll slide your shirt and bra off to reveal your

amazing chest...then I'll slide your panties off and

let your wetness soak my tounge...

That's just the beginning!

HER

tell me something about you.

are you clean?

are you insane?

do you have a metrocard?

are you just looking for any girl or a particular kind?

i am 5'11 and jiggly physically.  creative type.  like a nice

talk and then some concentrated action.  you seem like you are

well able to do the job.  i just want to find out if you are

interesting.  cool?

HIM

Yeah,

I am very clean.  Far from insance.  I have a

metrocard.  I LOVE tall girls!  I used to own two

pizza restaurants and a catering business.  I was also

a college cheerleader at two colleges.  I would love

to meet up with you.  I know we'll have a great time. 

I just moved to NYC a couple of weeks ago and haven't

met very many people yet.  You can also come to my

place if you want.  My roommate is out of town for the

weekend.  

Let me know what you want to do!

HER

you sound like a nice guy.  how was it being a cheerleader?  i

totally don't believe you're that new to the city though.  ;-)

what do you do now?  can you come to (NYC Neighborhood)?  i am really not

looking to travel at this hour.

HIM

It was really cool for a while, but then it got old. 

It was just too much work for too little reward.  I

really did just get here on May 10th.  I'd love to

come out to (NYC Neighborhood).  Just give me an address, and

I'll find a way to come out there, it will be fun!

HER

you want to give me a phone number and i will call you?

the name is _______ by the way.  thought that information might

prove handy at some point.

HIM

I'm _____, and my number is __________

I'm gonna shower up really quick.. I'll be out in a

little bit!

Thursday June 16

HER

hey.  it's _______. 

what's up?  

you good?

what are you up to this weekend?  

and when i say that, i mean:

i want to see you this weekend you sweetlovin man.  

if that's the kind of thing you're into.  

or later.  if that's your style.

or whatever.  let me know.

Oddly, She gets no email back from him.
Hmm...
That's what happens when you want something.  People can tell.  And someone is getting satsifaction out of not giving it to you.

Wed. August 10: After HIS random booty call text messages.

HER
hey you freak show.  good to hear from you.  yeah, i got your

number and such.  have you gotten my text message replies?  at

any rate, let me know what you are up to this weekend.  i have a

show opening on saturday so i have been all busy this week, but

maybe friday night, or sunday afternoon we could meet up... let

me know...

HIM

On your message, I thought you said that your show opens on Friday night? Which night are you free? Friday or Saturday? Can we do it at your place again? Will you shave for me? Let me know.....

HER

hey baby...

no, my show opens saturday night, i am free later tonight like after 9 or so... of course we can meet up at my place... and in terms of shaving, depends on what you mean. legs, definitely. pussy, not so much.

let me know if that will work out for you...

Fri. August 26--After a lascivious late-night hookup in an office building:

He called her drunk, suggesting they do it in a nearby park.  She wanted to have some of that fantastic sex with him, but was not so keen on doing it tranny-hooker style.  One of their offices was nearby.  She started in with a blowjob after they made out.  He ejaculated in her mouth about 3 minutes later (not without sighing in exasperation before hand and then knowingly asking her not to stop) and the party ended abruptly.  He felt bad about his performance, and promised to prove himself the stallion she remembered that weekend.
However... 

HIM

Hey,

I'm not going to be able to come over tomorrow. I spoke w/ my ex-girlfriend today, and we're going to get back together. I wouldn't feel right about coming over. I hope you understand!

Then she called him on Saturday and told him he was mean and inconsiderate for thinking that he could email her something like that (rather than calling at the very least) after having put his penis inside of her (or anyone for that matter). Not cool.

Then nothing for 5 or so months

Then out of the blue…

Sat. Feb. 4

HIM

hey....what are you up to?   are you awake?  did you

find someone to replace me?  did you like

fucking/sucking me?  let  me know baby....I loved your mouth around me!!!

Sun. Feb. 5

HER

dude, are you on coke or something? do you remember our last email interchange?

no, i didn't find someone to replace you because we had a one-night stand. and, i did enjoy fucking you, the first time; it was amazing fucking. and i even enjoyed sucking you the second time, with the hopes that i would be fucked again, which, of course, didn't happen... since (as is the case now) you were having problems with your girlfriend and got tanked and thought you might fuck me for a minute while you were feeling down. which is nice for you, but simply makes me a random wet opening. only problem is, i have to respect me, even when you won't.

the sexiest part of you is was how honest you were. honest and intuitive. that's why the sex was amazing. and if you could have treated with some respect the fact that i am the same way... all i am saying is, i had a lot of good fucking for you. but you left me with a bad taste in my mouth. one that was cold, distant and mean the last i saw you. one that you can defniitely have back.

to be clear: i was a one-night stand, and you really didn't/don't owe me anything, except for treating me like, you know, someone... and perhaps not suggesting that we fuck in a park. remember? i am, in fact, really surprised to hear from you, and that you thought i might have forgotten about all of that. or that you actually did forget about it. or that you thought it was okay. or that i would just get over it at the possibility of your cock. or that i am dumb, or desparate. all of which are clearly not true.

but, you are an attractive, successful businessman. there is a whole city full of girls that that is going to work on. enjoy.

no hard feelings.

And thus ends, at least her feelings of lameness.
Because as long as a man acts like a roach, he is guaranteed to come crawling back.<<